KIDDING, I’m not really refreshing my browser every five minutes. It’s more like every two. I’M ONLY HUMAN, OKAY?

So unless you somehow missed my 500 posts on the topic, you already know my second novel, Red Water, is out today. If you’ve read it, please review it? If you haven’t read it, OMG, WHAT THE HELL? Just kidding. It only came out today. I’m TOTALLY fine with you reading it overnight tonight and leaving your review tomorrow morning. #ImVeryFlexible

If you’re on the fence about whether or not to read Red Water, check out the reviews that are popping up on Amazon.

It has hit number 24 in its category, and the reviews are kinda … awesome? I’m still feeling a little shifty-eyed about the positivity though, like, are the people who hated it just too nice to tell me how they felt? Are they like, “Kristen’s too emotionally fragile to tell her she sucks”? Am I about to get punked? STAY YOUR ASS IN THE BUSHES, ASHTON KUTCHER.

*refreshes Amazon page, finds one more review, has minor heart attack, eats a dozen robin’s eggs from kids’ easter baskets*

It’s going to be a long week, guys.

And now for a little dark humor. A reader sent me this earlier this morning, re: Black-Eyed Susie:

If you’ve read Black-Eyed Susie, you know why this is hilarious.

I love my readers.

RED WATER

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